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Tocmai ce-am aflat ca m-am imbogatit

marți, august 27, 2013
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Cele mai amuzante bancuri

Era asa de urata incat, atunci cand mi-a trimis o poza pe mail, antivirusul a sters-o...

Guvernul a gasit o solutie inedita pentru iesirea din criza:marim preturile si micsoram salariile.

http://mioritice.libertatea.ro/bancuri/cele-mai-noi/?page=2#ixzz2dCGhS9WL

Sotia catre sot: Sotia catre sot:
-Dragul meu, hai sa cumparam o masina, eu voi invata sa conduc, vom vedea lumea...
-Care, asta sau cealalta?

Seara soţ şi soţie Seara soţ şi soţie, vizioneaza unui film de groază. Dintr-odată apare pe ecran un monstru.
Soţia:
- Oh, mamă!
Soţul:
- Da, seamană…

Un tip la biblioteca: Un tip la biblioteca:
- Fiti amabila, vreau si eu o carte despre sinucideri!
- Pleaca de aici, ca tu n-o mai aduci inapoi!!

Discuţie între doi cerşetori Discuţie între doi cerşetori:
-Ce, acum eşti ciung?
-Ce să fac? Când eram orb primeam doar bani falşi!

Un patron catre altul:
- Cum de angajatii tai sunt mereu asa punctuali?
- Simplu: am 30 de angajati si 20 de locuri de parcare.

Mamico Mamico, nu pot sa dorm! Spune-mi, te rog, o poveste!
- E trecut de 1 noaptea. Las' ca vine taticul imediat si cand o sa-l intreb
pe unde-a fost, o sa ne spuna el o poveste!

Frizerul il intreaba pe client Frizerul il intreaba pe client :
- Cum sa va tund ca sa fiti multumit ?
- Gratis !

Doua babe in cimitir Doua babe in cimitir.
-Auzi, tu citi ani ai?
-99.
-Si mai pleci acasa?


Ai venit la tzanc, bunico
Ai venit la tzanc, bunico - zise nepotelul deschizand usa - tata tocmai spunea ca numai dumneata mai lipseai. La tribunal... La tribunal: - Esti acuzat ca ti-ai omorat soacra cu sânge rece. De ce ai facut-o? - Nevasta-mea mi-a zis... - Cum poti sa spui asa ceva, sotia ta îsi iubea foarte mult mama! - Asa e, da' înainte de a pleca, în ziua respectiva, mi-a zis: "Marcele, daca în timp ce doarme o deranjeaza vreo musca, n-o trezi, omoar-o!" Moarta si intoarsa Gheorghe isi inmormanteaza soacra. Vine omu' nostru acasa si cand sa deschida poarta ii pica o tigla in cap. Gheorghe contrariat se uita spre cer: - Ai si ajuns, scarba?! Interzis soacrelor O femeie cauta o carte in biblioteca. Sotul o intreaba: - Ce cauti draga? - Stii unde e cartea acea: "Cum sa traim pana la 140 de ani"? - Da, tocmai am aruncat-o...... - De ce? - Incepuse maica-ta sa o citeasca! Ion si maria in pat: Ion si Maria in pat: - Ma ioane, mie mi-e cam frig... - Pune o patura pe tine! - Tot mi-e frig. - Si ce vrei sa-ti fac? - Pai,stii, cand mama ii zicea lu` tata ca ii e frig, el o lua in brate... - Si de unde vrei sa-l iau eu pe tactu la ora asta??? Ion si Maria, la maternitate: - No Marie, ce avem? - Baiat. - No, .... si cu cine seamana? - ... degeaba-ti spun, ca nu-l cunosti http://divertisment.okay.ro/categorie~bancuri-soacre~_start-12.html

marți, august 27, 2013
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Greseli haioase pe siteuri

funny

marți, august 27, 2013
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Elena Basescu in copilarie

luni, august 26, 2013
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Idei tunsori femei mature

Idei tunsori

luni, august 26, 2013
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